Monday, May 30, 2011

Hearts, Flowers, Unicorns, and a Guitar

The next meeting of LFWG is this Wednesday at noon! The theme for June is FLOWERS. If you were at the last meeting, you know that we worked on a collaborative song, and GUESS WHAT? It will be debuted this Wednesday in The Fishbowl. I'll have my guitar, and Angela will bring her amazing iPad and play bass. So ya'll come!

Friday, May 27, 2011

Writing Prompts and Illicit Substances

Writing Prompts first, my freaky darlings, then we can get on to the second half of that title.
Karen was in charge of prompts for the month of May, and she came up with a great one for the last LFWG meeting. Each of us picked an object in the room and wrote about its future.

This was Susan's first time at LFWG, so her work gets to go first.

by Susan
Battered and threadbare, the bag hangs in the closet. Doors open and close, coats come and go, time stretches, days fade in and speed by. Then the bag is pulled out, knocked against walls and bodies, stuffed with books and electronics, and tossed over a shoulder.

The Last Cakeball
by Ginny
The last cakeball, surprisingly enough, was left in the tin after the celebration. Angela was sure everyone would eat them all, and would have , herself, but they were extremely rich, and she could only enjoy one without them starting to cloy.
So there it sat among crumbs. The lid was closed and the box taken back home to the refrigerator, in the hopes that someone would enjoy it later. But no one did.
A week went by, and the variance of temperature in the refrigerator allowed the chocolate to flow and flatten out, leaving exposed cake base.

The Pen in My Hand
by Karen
What a limited future. This pen is one of the few objects in my life that will not outlast me. I suspect much of the grocery store food items have a longer shelf life than any of us do.
How odd to see our belongings outlive us - by centuries even. To think of this pen gives me some sense of satisfaction, of closure, I will not hand it down to a grandchild. It will not show up in future photos or in a museum display. It will not see flying cars or jet packs or the end of the world.
I will throw it away - next week, next month, sometime, soon. I will, barring act of God, not pass it on to live long after me.

by Angela
There's one mint Oreo ball left, so Jessica pops it into a baggie and puts it in her purse. For long hours, nothing happens. Then Jessica hops into her van and drives to choir practice. She has a tray of confections, and she takes the mint Oreo ball out of the baggie and places it among its cousins. Very possibly one of the tenors (Zach? David? Christopher? - Ephrem would, but he's not there because his stepdaughter has a concert...) picks it up and eats it. His praise is lukewarm, so Jessica tells him that she didn't make that one, but nobody believes her.

Now, on to the illicit substances. Because Ginny had recently gotten a contact for her book, we had a little celebration in the Fishbowl. (Food is not allowed in the Fishbowl. We did a bad, bad thing.) Angela brought mint Oreo balls, and I brought Knock-You-Naked Brownies. Yum was had by all!
For June, David was given the task of deciding on the theme and writing prompts. The theme is FLOWERS.

Next meeting of LFWG is on June 1st at Noon. If I have gotten my voice back by then, I'll debut the 'song' we worked on last time.
Love, Peace, and Taco Grease!

Thursday, May 5, 2011


Howdy, folks! Yesterday we had a meeting, and if you weren't there, you missed some fun. Karen is in charge of writing prompts for the month of May, and she brought a great one courtesy of Writer's Digest.
"Ever read a book that's all over the bestseller charts and walk away from it unimpressed, wishing someone would've rejected it from the get-go? Or maybe you read about an author who was rejected 47 times before actually getting his or her bestseller published and think, I wonder what those rejection letters said? Well, here's your chance to have a little fun..."
Here are LFWG's responses to this prompt.

By David

Dear Ms. Crocker,
After many attempts to replicate the highly technical but rather bland works in your submission, we regret to inform you that we cannot publish your book. It made our stomachs curdle on many occasions. We found the language inaccessible and sometimes down right esoteric. The food was of the lowest caliber - peasant food, really. We wouldn't feel comfortable serving anything from your book to our dogs or cats. We hope that you will choose to stay out of the kitchen. Maybe you could take up sewing or macrame. Just promise the world you will take your red checked apron off.

By me

Dear C.S. Lewis-
Found your book about the wardrobe to be a bit over the heads of readers. What we are currently looking for is bravery stories, real boys' material, and all that sword and talking animal nonsense combines the worst of Winnie the Pooh and Snow White.
Some Editor

Dear C.S. Lewis-
I told you to cut the sisters from that book. Too much girly - family stuff. And the white witch/Edmond business is a bit racy  if you ask me. Let's concentrate more on the fighting, but set it in England and more modern, please.
Your Agent

By Angela

Parsons Publishing

Dear Mr. Boccaccio:
We thank you for submitting your work The Decameron to our house. However, it does not meet our needs at this time.
The frame story is no longer the prevailing style nowadays, and a single contiguous novel is far closer to the tastes of our readers than a collection of unrelated stories. Furthermore, several of your tales seem to be critical of the Church. Our publishing house is not interested in provoking the ire of the College of Cardinals at this time.
However, we encourage you to continue writing, and possibly consider sending some of your short stories to our periodical "Sex and the Plague."
Angela Borgia, editor

By Karen

Dear Sir/Madam-
We regret to inform you that the novel you submitted Harry Porter, etc. did not fit with our publishing needs at this time. Unfortunately, we feel your work would not appeal to a wide enough audience. Since we produce mass market books, your efforts would not fit our wide spread distribution needs. For instance, would girls be interested in the story of a boy wizard? We think not. This project just wouldn't catch on or prove very popular.
In addition, fantasy books just don't sell these days. Fantasy has become out-dated.
Perhaps if you changed your focus, included a female protagonist with a dead parent and added some strong female role models you could try again.

If you would like to try your hand at Reject-a-Hit, and see it here on the blog, send it to If you'd like to submit one (400 words max) to Writer's Digest, email it to wdsubmissions and put Inkwell: Reject a hit in the subject line.

The rest of the meeting was spent working on projects by Karen (Civil War, anyone?) and Angela (Climactic scene in her novel). David read another of his children's story books, and I brought coloring books. It was a fun a productive meeting, and I hope to see you all next time, May 18th.